Getting Organized!

Getting Organized!

by Esperanza DeLaLuz

“Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up.” A A Milne

 

Let’s start with this premise: Organizing things does not make you a better mom. But it does make it easier to find the Band-Aids, and for me, being ADHD, I am able to be a better mom when I have inner peace; and my personal inner peace is disturbed by chaos. But I know lots of wonderful mothers, including my own, who love and care exquisitely well, in a state of frequent disorder.

That said, I am a passionate organizer.  People actually pay me to come organize their kitchen or garage. There are some basic principles to organizing that might be useful to most people to one extent or another, that I thought I might share:

1. Simplify there are lots of wonderful systems to encourage us to simplify, but most of them boil down to only keeping things that you need, or use, or enjoy. Less stuff means less clutter and less maintenance. But there is also something to be said for having useful backup supplies like food storage, meds, or craft supplies, for preparedness purposes also. But remember, those things are only useful to you if you can find them when a crisis makes them necessary.

2. Contain things – using baskets, boxes, bags, bottles, tubs, cupboards, drawers, etc., This is probably the most important element of organizing. My grandmother used to say “A place for everything, and everything in its place.” My father used to line his top drawer with all kinds of tiny boxes with places for each thing he kept there: watch, coins, keys, etc. So I come by it naturally. But when things are where they belong, my environment is neater, I can find things I need, and I am aware of how much I have and if I have things I can do without. 

It is also helpful to use similar sized and shaped things. For example, having all your dishes or food storage containers the same size makes them stack more neatly. (I actually cut the tops off plastic bleach bottles and used them to stack all my round containers of that size inside them, which kept them from falling over.)

3. Put like things together it continually surprises me when I go to help someone clean or organize, how often I find similar things in several different places. Now, it makes sense to have things in different places when you use them in multiple places. I have scissors in every room, for example, and of course, toothpaste in most every bathroom. But keeping things together that are the same, or that are used together makes sense. And subdividing those grouped things, so that each kind of thing has its own place can be very useful. You will notice if it is missing, for one thing, or if you have more than you need.

4. Label your stuff I am probably too focused on labels, because I am absent-minded, and my labeler is one of my favorite tools. But labeling things helps us remember where they belong. Labels can help you identify what goes where and if it is missing. Most of the time you can do this subtly; you can have specific colors of towels for each bathroom, for example, or other visual cues that identify where things belong without actual labels. But you can also do them in cute ways, with fancy labels that are part of the décor. 

My sister pointed out that using pretty baskets to organize my craft supplies was more appealing, more “Feng Shui” than using my labeled assortment of plastic boxes. She was right! So, over the years I picked up lots of fancy baskets at second hand stores.  But then I found that they didn’t look good with labels on them. (But it gave me another fun crafting project to make a lot of cute little wooden plaques to attach to the fronts of the baskets.)

When keeping multiples for utility purposes, labeling which set goes where is very useful. For example, I write on those scissors with a permanent marker which room they belong in, so they don’t end up all in one room when I have used them. 

5. Store things where they are used we keep the dishes in the kitchen naturally, but sometimes don’t apply that same idea to other places in our home. Closets, cupboards or drawers are less likely to become catch-alls, if you limit them to containing only things that are useful in that place. Of course, there are things that get used in multiple places. Some people keep multiples like I do with the scissors, others make a specific cabinet or dresser drawer for all those things. I have a “utility dresser” with drawers for simple household tools, tape, batteries, lightbulbs, and other things that everyone needs to get to often. Some people keep a “junk drawer” for things that have no specific place, but this is a poor idea since it gets crammed full of stuff that does not ever get assigned to its own place.

6. List stuff Keeping a list, in a notebook, on the back of a cupboard, or on a computer, can be very useful, especially with stored supplies. It also helps keep supplies current. If there is a list on the back of the medicine cabinet mirror of what you plan to keep in that cabinet, you might be more likely to notice you are out of Band-Aids. A list of what goes in each cupboard on the back of the door, or a master list of desired food storage items, or a list of where important documents are stored can be very useful. Just make sure you have a specific place to keep the lists!

7. Put things back! This is probably the hardest part for most people. We are naturally lazy, and we don’t want to get up and put things away all the time. But a basket on the stairs for things that need to go upstairs, or a defined place in each room to set things that don’t belong in that room, can make it easier to go around and put things back. You can also make a game of it for little children.  Some younger children actually think it is fun to go put Daddy’s tie in the bedroom for a few raisins! But you can also set up a pattern of going around gathering and putting things back once a day, if you cannot make yourself put things back right away.

8. A few clever helps – everyone has stuff in their house that other people left there. Setting up a basket by the door for these things not only contains them, but also makes it easier to remember to give them back or return them. A box by the garage door for things that need to go out of your home on errands makes it easier to get those errands done and get those things out of your house. Having a specific shelf for your purse, or for school books and back packs, makes finding them much easier. 

Drawer dividers, hook racks, extra shelves inside cabinets, and tote bags can be very useful tools. Having a tote specifically to hold smaller things for organizing (tiny boxes, plastic packets, bags, and such) makes it easier to find something to use to contain and organize things. A place to set things when you first come home, such as a table, bench, or shelf keeps things from getting piled up on the floor. 

Setting up a specific rack in which to put outgoing and incoming mail, a key rack, a mirror, the family calendar, and a place to leave notes, all by the front door can be very useful. A hook rack for hat, coats, sunglasses, flashlight, umbrellas, tote bags, sunscreen or other things that are often needed as leaving the house is useful, too, especially if it can be near the door.

I hope that these general principles can make your life a little bit easier!

 

Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing (D&C 88:119)

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Caterpillar Mommy

Caterpillar Mommy

By Diana

What do you think of when you hear the word “caterpillar?” 

I can’t help but think of this enormous overwhelming sense of potential that it represents, because I instantly think “butterfly” too.  However, this beautiful butterfly is not created overnight. It takes time, patience, energy. It takes growth in all ways, in all shapes, and in lots of sizes. Each caterpillar enters into its own protective home, and awaits its transformation. 

For me, motherhood has, at times, left me feeling quite like a caterpillar. Being a mom is the thing that adds any butterfly into my life at all. It helps me see my potential, and shows me the beauty within myself. Sometimes that beautiful part emerges and I remember the good in me. 

Aren’t we each a work in progress? Aren’t we all transforming into greater and better versions of ourselves? It is so easy to grow impatient as we change and prepare to spread our wings. We have to trust in ourselves; trust in the “progress” part of “work in progress.” It is okay if you still feel like a caterpillar—as long as you remember you are continually transforming into something fabulous.

Photo by British Library on Unsplash

Let’s Get Real!

Let’s Get Real!

By Annette T. Durfee

Have you ever noticed the oddities of life?

 

Like how come the birthday cake you’re making never looks like the one in the picture?  Never mind comparing it to the picture – it is actually a cake made of four layers, so that means you actually have to use two cake mixes, but the picture won’t tell you that.  Pay no attention to the fact that the crack in the side of the cake will NOT stay “glued” together, no matter how much frosting you use to cement it together.  Humph!  And please don’t notice the huge crumbs that are adhering to the once-white frosting.  Perhaps, you conclude, the sides look better unfrosted anyway!

OR – Does it ever seem that the most meaningful conversation with your spouse is at the end of the day at the bathroom sink while you are foaming at the mouth with an electric toothbrush wildly sputtering, unable in the least to utter a sensible word?  So, you play the game of charades or better yet – an impromptu sign language as you try to decipher the foreign language without splattering toothpaste blobs on the mirror as you laugh through the hilarity of it all?

OR  – Do you find yourself seething at the injustice of finding that there are always at least 3 diapers left in the package that absolutely WILL NOT fit your baby before they transfer to the next size up?  AND –  Have you ever noticed why, with so few people in the family, you manage to dirty every cup in the house – including the measuring cups?

I’m probably not the only one who has had more than her share of Pinterest fails and foibles.  But if my Betty Crocker skills don’t take the cake at least my attitude will.  If you’re like me, and even one of these scenarios rings true for you, this might be a good time to take a look at a happy principle that can help every mother and homemaker:  realistic expectations.  Yes, with a little reality check, you can take anything that comes with ease.

ACCEPTANCE

Did you know that some things are supposed to be imperfect?

Mismatched socks, scuffs on your best running shoes, sticky fingerprints on the fridge door handle.  Almost imperceptibly, dust, flabby bellies, and burnt toast happen.  Life happens! 

There’s nothing wrong with you.  There’s nothing wrong with your family. It is what it is.  And it’s not only OK for it to be this way, it is supposed to be that way! 

Take the coffee table for example – an innocent enough piece of furniture wouldn’t you say?  But in a house full of children, is it really going to stay a center focal piece impressively set with elegant table top décor?   Of course not!  You and I both know that even the best homes aren’t picture perfect. 

We can expect that homes with children have their fair share of crumbs, smelly socks, broken figurines, lost items, scattered toys, ripped pages in books, smears on the sliding glass door, and on and on.  It helps when I know that some things will inevitably happen because it allows me a great deal of sanity for when the unexpected happens and things don’t work out perfectly. 

In fact, if you can look at it with a smile in your heart, you might just find it so ludicrous that it provides a moment of laughter that you look back on with fondness.

While mothering my Littles, I frequently found peace of mind through a quote often attributed to Marjorie Pay Hinckley to help me remember that my priorities were just where they should be:

“I don’t want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails. I want to drive up in a station wagon that has mud on the wheels from taking kids to scout camp. I want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbor’s children. I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someone’s garden. I want to be there with children’s sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder. I want the Lord to know I was really here, and that I really lived.”

Expecting reality doesn’t mean admitting defeat!

I can expect, for example, that my children will make endless messes (and I will too), but that doesn’t stop us from cleaning it up at the appropriate time. 

My communication with my spouse may be spotty at times, but that doesn’t mean we neglect our relationship.  We regularly and consistently schedule time to be with one another to just TALK (most times without a dental implement in hand). 

We are gloriously imperfect in each and every way, but we set goals, and give assignments.  And we put our plan into action with a little elbow grease.  We do it, remembering the WHY of it all – not to satisfy some plausible guest who never seems to stop by, nor even to catch up to the Jones family (although we admit that they ARE a nice bunch!) – but because we like it that way.  In fact, we even enjoy it!

I am enough.

I can be happy without being Pinterest Perfect.  While the Internet world of “reality” sometimes creates a facade of perfectly clean homes, the Gerber baby who never cries, and homes decorated to a “T,” I can be happy with what we have and who we are becoming.  I may also (heaven forbid) go without some of the niceties of the luxury homes in order to allow myself to spend more time concentrating my efforts more closely on building a strong home and family.  We can also give ourselves credit for being creative, even if it means that we make a mess for a while. 

We are, after all, learning, growing, and developing together.  In fact, we are a living, breathing work of art!  I suppose the casual passerby may judge me and my efforts (or seemingly lack of them), but that judge won’t be me.  I will give myself grace allowing me and my family space to be real humans. We ARE indeed “good enough.” We can have strength and self – confidence to do and be and achieve in real albeit imperfect ways.

Photo by Christopher Martyn on Unsplash

What does Self-Reliance mean to you?

What does Self-Reliance mean to you?

By Leigha Westover

Please take a moment to ponder the meaning of Self Reliance.

Webster’s dictionary states that self-reliance is reliance on one’s own efforts and abilities. If we are to take this into account then I am not very self-reliant — I need the aid of others to provide my clothes, food, and shelter.  In our society, we have prospered by using our personal efforts and abilities to share and provide for others’ needs, as they also do for us.  In exchange for the services rendered, we use the value of currency.

As a child, I learned to work and contribute in our home while my father went to work to provide for our needs. As I progressed in years, my desire to become more independent increased. I secured a job in a delicatessen as a part-time server, so I was able to provide for some of the increased desires of a teenager, such as entertainment.  

Approaching my young adult years I continued to thrive and advanced to being able to purchase a car and move into an apartment with other young adults. My understanding of finance was just to meet the basics and get by. As I was learning and growing socially, spiritually, and mentally, I did not increase my understanding of providing beyond what I needed.

I continued to live by the basic principles of earning just enough to get by for the first 25 years of marriage.  We struggled, trying to get ahead financially and we never got there. We always had barely enough for us and sometimes not even that. My underdeveloped outlook on budgeting limited my family. Occasionally I would stretch out my faith to believe there would be enough when the kids wanted to invite a friend to eat with us. And there always was even when I lacked faith and said no.  

As you seek to understand what self-reliance means for you in your life, you may discover that you have more learning to do. Identify principles — statements of truth — you can try to apply to your daily life.

SOME PRINCIPLES TO CONSIDER: 

Pay the Lord first (tithing and/or donations), then pay yourself (savings), then SPEND WISELY.

  • This principle has always been on the top of my list.  For doing this I know that all my wants and desires were met.  

Build up the self-discipline necessary to live according to your budget. 

  • I would write out a budget.  But it was limited to our needs, not our desires and goals.

Be willing to sacrifice for the sake of stability.

  • I felt like I was always sacrificing and there was no room for improvement. I learned to grow my willingness to do more if possible and then do it one step at a time.

Less really can be more. Simplify! Embrace the concept of ENOUGH. 

  • Again I felt we had less; what else could I do? I did rearrange where the funds would go, having specific accounts for the necessities that come up.  Dental, Medical, and car repairs.  Things that are not every month but do come up.  

Get out of debt and save to purchase what you want.   

  • When you are tied to payments that use up your paycheck before you receive it, it binds you down.  You may not feel free to be generous and bless others. When reviewing your budget get rid of things you don’t need. Sell off what you can and get rid of the debt to free yourself from the bondage.

Money is not a god worthy of our worship. Trust in financial good karma!

  • My understanding at the time was: “I am blessed to have what I have! Why would I want more when others have less than I do?” This is where I learned I needed to change my attitude. If I want to help others, I have to first be in a position to do so. My budget changed to create more and so I am able to do more.  

It may not always be money you will be blessed with. It may be as simple as creating a revolving closet in your home or extra food in your garden etc. .  As you are blessed with plenty, bless others with it as well.  We do not need to hold on when others burdens can be lighter. 

Work together to make things work: Value ALL the work necessary to make a family successful, whether or not it brings in financial income. 

  • As a family, counsel together and help each other understand and know their needs and desires. Work together to set goals to help each other feel like they are a part of the solution to pay for a family vacation, a new car or repairs, a soccer club, braces, or medical expenses.

In the Bible, we read “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly” (John 10:10). I believe that if our desire is to do good continually to comfort, strengthen, and clothe our neighbor (love them!), we must budget wisely, and then when we are blessed with excess, we can pass it on to others.

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Postpartum Depression – What is it and What Should I Do About it?

Postpartum Depression – What is it and What Should I Do About it?

By Brittany Sewall 

Having a baby is an exciting moment! There are a lot of changes you go through as a woman; physically, mentally, and emotionally. It is a rollercoaster ride of emotions those first few days after welcoming your little one into this world. You experience highs and lows, and you may be flooded with joy, love, fear, and anxiety. This is all very common for most women to experience in those first few days after birth, lasting up to the first two weeks. This is referred to as the baby blues, which you might have heard of before. The baby blues affect 50-75% of women, and typically start within a couple of days after giving birth and can last up to two weeks. Baby blues symptoms can include:

    •     Anxiety
    •     Sadness
    •     Mood swings
    •     Feeling irritable or overwhelmed
    •     Crying for no reason
    •     Irregular appetite
    •     Difficulty sleeping

 If these symptoms do not resolve after two weeks, seem to be worsening or feel more intense, it could be postpartum depression (PPD).

PPD is a serious mental condition that affects your physical health and behavior. The symptoms of PPD usually develop within the first few weeks after childbirth but can happen up to one year after your baby is born. It is easy to mistake PPD for the baby blues at first because the symptoms are very similar. However, with PPD, the symptoms may start to affect your ability to care for your baby or interfere with tasks of daily living. Symptoms of PPD can include:

    •     Feeling shameful
    •     Feeling guilty or worthless
    •     Persistent sadness, hopelessness, or crying
    •     Anger or mood swings
    •     Sleeping more or less than normal
    •     Inability to care for yourself or your baby
    •     Loss of appetite
    •     Feeling hostile towards your baby
    •     Difficulty bonding with your baby
    •     Intense anxiety
    •     Withdrawing from family and friends
    •     Thoughts of harming yourself or your baby

 Postpartum depression affects 1 in 7 women. If a woman has a history of PPD with previous pregnancies, she has a 30% higher chance of having it again. You also might be at a higher risk if you have bipolar disorder, your baby has health issues, you have twins or triplets, if the pregnancy was unwanted, if you’re having relationship problems, have a weak support system, or financial problems.

If you, or someone you know, might be experiencing PPD, please reach out. Talk to your partner, talk to your nurse, talk to your doctor or midwife. Please do not suffer in silence. Some women try to hide these feelings. They might feel like they are a bad mother, feel ashamed or guilty. Some women feel like they are the only ones feeling this way or that it’s not normal, which then can make them feel embarrassed. There are multiple options for mothers suffering with PPD that can help.

Therapy is a very common treatment option for PPD. Counseling can help you dive into your emotions, try to understand, and work through them. Support groups can also be a helpful avenue as it allows you the opportunity to talk with other women who are experiencing the same thing and can help you feel less alone. Dealing with PPD can make people feel very secluded, so knowing other people that are going through similar struggles can be very comforting. Another treatment some women explore is medications. Most commonly doctors will prescribe an antidepressant which can help manage your symptoms. There are also antidepressants that are safe to take while breastfeeding, so if you’re nursing you don’t have to stop in order to take these. You and your doctor can work together to find the right medication and right dosage. It does typically take several weeks for these medications to start working, so try not to stress if you don’t feel any different immediately after starting one.

Postpartum depression is no joke. It is a serious condition that can often be overlooked as “normal” for mothers to experience. Please speak up if you are experiencing any of these symptoms that describe PPD. Work with your health care team to find the right treatment plan for you so you can start healing mentally. Ignoring these symptoms can eventually affect your baby. To give the best care to your baby, you must take care of yourself too.

Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research. (2022, November 24). Postpartum depression. Mayo Clinic.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/postpartum-depression/symptoms-causes/syc-20376617 

Postpartum depression: Causes, symptoms & treatment. Cleveland Clinic. (2024, July 17).
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9312-postpartum-depression#management-and-treatment 

Postpartum depression: Office on Women’s Health. OASH | Office on Women’s Health. (2023, October 17).
https://womenshealth.gov/mental-health/mental-health-conditions/postpartum-depression

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