Let’s Get Real!
By Annette T. Durfee
Have you ever noticed the oddities of life?
Like how come the birthday cake you’re making never looks like the one in the picture? Never mind comparing it to the picture – it is actually a cake made of four layers, so that means you actually have to use two cake mixes, but the picture won’t tell you that. Pay no attention to the fact that the crack in said carrot cake will NOT stay “glued” together, no matter how much frosting you use to cement it together. Humph! And don’t even notice the huge crumbs that are adhering to the once-white frosting. Perhaps, you conclude, the sides look better unfrosted anyway! OR – Does it ever seem that the most meaningful conversation with your spouse is at the end of the day at the bathroom sink while you are foaming at the mouth with an electric toothbrush wildly sputtering, unable in the least to utter a sensible word? So, you play the game of charades or better yet – an impromptu sign language as you try to decipher the foreign language without splattering toothpaste blobs on the mirror as you laugh through the hilarity of it all? OR – Do you find yourself seething at the injustice of finding that there are always at least 3 diapers left in the package that absolutely WILL NOT fit your baby before they transfer to the next size up? AND – Have you ever noticed why, with so few people in the family, you manage to dirty every cup in the house – including the measuring cups? I’m probably not the only one who has had more than her share of Pinterest fails and foibles. But if my Better Crocker skills don’t take the cake at least my attitude will. If you’re like me, and even one of these scenarios rings true for you, this might be a good time to take a look at a happy principle that can help every mother and homemaker: realistic expectations. Yes, with a little reality check, you can take anything that comes with ease.ACCEPTANCE
Did you know that some things are supposed to be imperfect?
Mismatched socks, scuffs on your best running shoes, sticky fingerprints on the fridge door handle. Almost imperceptibly, dust, flabby bellies, and burnt toast happen. Life happens! There’s nothing wrong with you. There’s nothing wrong with your family. It is what it is. And it’s not only OK for it to be this way, it is supposed to be that way! Take the coffee table for example – an innocent enough piece of furniture wouldn’t you say? But in a house full of children, is it really going to stay a center focal piece impressively set with elegant table top décor? Of course not! You and I both know that even the best homes aren’t picture perfect. We can expect that homes with children have their fair share of crumbs, smelly socks, broken figurines, lost items, scattered toys, ripped pages in books, smears on the sliding glass door, and on and on. It helps when I know that some things will inevitably happen because it allows me a great deal of sanity for when the unexpected happens and things don’t work out perfectly. In fact, if you can look at it with a smile in your heart, you might just find it so ludicrous that it provides a moment of laughter that you look back on with fondness. While mothering my Littles, I frequently found peace of mind through a quote often attributed to Marjorie Pay Hinckley to help me remember that my priorities were just where they should be:
“I don’t want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails. I want to drive up in a station wagon that has mud on the wheels from taking kids to scout camp. I want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbor’s children. I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someone’s garden. I want to be there with children’s sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder. I want the Lord to know I was really here, and that I really lived.”
