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Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
One day, my 12 year old son came to me, telling me he was tired of getting reprimanded. Now, he’s a good kid with a great sense of humor. He has excellent work ethic and is very thorough *when* he does his chores.
This particular day, he hadn’t yet done his chores even after several reminders… and as he voiced his concern, I had to agree that I had indeed been getting on him quite a bit for his annoying actions towards his siblings.
I never intended to be the kind of mother who points out everything my child is doing wrong. I also regretted focusing on his faults, since I buy into the concept that what you focus on increases! I took a deep breath and hugged him and suggested we have a chat, assuring him that I knew one of his talents is his willingness to talk things over!
We discussed what kinds of actions were getting him into trouble. As our conversation continued, it became clear that he had been so busy bugging his brothers and sisters that he ran out of time to do his chores.
I decided to take what we were learning and phrase it more positively:
When you’re busy doing the things you’re supposed to be doing, you won’t have time to get in trouble!
I can think of all sorts of ways this applies to life! Not just the life of a sweet 12 year old who is feeling worn down, but to all of us who struggle with guilt. Sometimes I’m so aware of my imperfections and basically, reprimand myself all day — that it sucks away my energy to accomplish the good stuff.
So I’m going to start taking my own advice and flip that dynamic to my benefit. I’m going to be so busy with the good stuff that the bad stuff will naturally get cut out of my time-limited day. I won’t have time to scowl, yell, and complain because I’ll be too busy being grateful, giving compliments and encouragement, and smiling instead.
Mom, try replacing the things that get you in trouble with good things that you’re supposed to be doing! Then share if this practice elevates your mothering!
Photo by Paul Skorupskas on Unsplash