Meditation

Meditation

By Alana Hutchins

A familiar word with an unfamiliar feeling. Over 14% of the U.S. population, and over 5% of children, have tried meditating at one point or another, but not everyone keeps up the practice. There are many different types of meditation, but let’s assume that as a busy mother you don’t feel like you have time for any of them.  In a stress- and anxiety-saturated world, it is no wonder people are looking for ways to detox their brains and regain their mental health. Meditation is not new; it is an ancient practice making a modern come back. Meditation can increase relaxation, develop mindfulness, and enhance overall well-being. 

Meditation involves the practice of calming the mind and enhancing your senses for improved awareness of an object of focus, usually one’s breathing process. By implementing a series of breathing exercises, the mind and body experience relief from stress and anxiety.

Here are the Facts:

  • Meditation can reduce insomnia by 50% if you are struggling to get a good night’s rest.
  •  Practicing meditation for only four days can increase your attention span.
  • Meditation for 6-9 months can reduce anxiety levels.
  • People who meditate are less likely to suffer from heart disease
  • Mindfulness meditation relieves back pain by 30%
  • It lowers blood pressure for 80% of people who practice, 
  • 60% of people who practice meditation find that it improves their energy
  •  50% of meditators say it aids in their memory and focus. 
  • Meditation reduces depression relapses by 12%
  • Mindfulness improves focus and productivity (by up to 120%!), as well as critical thinking and creativity.

If you are just starting out, I recommend you meditate for anywhere from 5-10 minutes a day. You can start with even less. Maybe try it for 1 minute in the morning when you can sit still and relax for that long, then move it to two minutes. This practice should be pleasant and enjoyable, not uncomfortable. Frequency is more important than duration. Maybe 30 minutes total could be an end goal—broken up into two or three sessions during the day. This will take time to develop for most because of our busy lives. 

Be clear about the time you will carve out and where you will sit, relatively undisturbed, because it will take discipline and perseverance to make a habit stick. Honor the routine of “same time, same place” to help build your meditation practice. Sit anyway you like, but sitting forward towards the front of your chair will help with the correct posture; back straight, neck relaxed, chin slightly tucked in with your hands loosely on your lap or knees.  Be clear about why you want to start meditation and it will help you stick with it. Do you want to feel happier, calmer, more focused, less stressed etc.? There are many online helps for people just starting out with meditation so take a deep breath, get out there—or rather in there—and give it a try! What do you have to lose?

Photo by Sumit Bisht on Unsplash

There are Beans in my Fudge

There are Beans in my Fudge

Here's an audio clip so you can listen to the Mom Tip!

Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.

There are beans in my fudge.

Black beans.

In my fudge.

Ya can’t taste ’em. The fudge is still quite fudge-y — *plenty* of sugar… The kids love it. I was even honest with them about the beans, and they didn’t seem worried at all.

I’ve been eating plenty of bean-y fudge, and I can report that there are no gaseous side effects so far! 

I’d also like to report an analogy that Beanie Fudge has brought to my mind.

21st century life is sweet!! Sometimes sickeningly sweet (like fudge). We have so many modern conveniences, time-saving devices, luxuries that are so commonplace we don’t even realize they’re luxuries anymore… and entertainment options out the wazoo.

When we hear about life even just one century ago, we moan and groan just thinking about all the work those poor people had to do. Work, after all, is a four-letter word!

Work is like the beans in my fudge… Hey, bean is a four-letter word, too!

The fiber, vitamins, minerals, and protein of beans offer life-sustaining substances amidst the sweetness that corrodes our teeth and disables our immune systems.

Admittedly, there is still approximately four times as much sugar as there are beans in this recipe. Maybe that mirrors our modern-day ratio of play-to-work? Back in our grandparents’ day, it was mostly beans and maybe a spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down…

Sometimes, I worry about our current culture of work avoidance, and feel that my duty as a mom is to introduce some beans in friendly ways, maybe disguised a bit in cocoa…

I don’t feel a need to eliminate the “sugar” altogether, but I conscientiously include *some* beans amidst the fudge so that if circumstances change and a reverse ratio of beans to sugar were required, it wouldn’t be a total shock to our systems!

I want to raise my children with both beans and sweetness. Hopefully, just like we’ve happily discovered about Beanie Fudge, this metaphorical equivalent will also be flatulence-free!

Moms, try making Beanie Fudge both in real life and metaphorically, then share if this practice elevates your mothering!

BEANIE FUDGE RECIPE

  • 1 Can of Black Beans — about 1 and 1/4 cups — drained and rinsed
  • 3/4 Cup cocoa — rounded
  • 3/4 Cup butter and/or coconut oil, warm enough to be mostly liquid
  • 4 Cups powdered sugar — scant

NOW CHOOSE A FLAVOR:

  • 2 Tbsps Vanilla 
  • OR 6-8 drops peppermint essential oil 
  • OR 3 Tbsp. peanut butter

PROCEDURE:

  1. Blend in a food processor or blender until smooth & creamy!
  2. Pour onto waxed paper and refrigerate at least 20 minutes before serving.
  3. Keep leftovers in the fridge — if there are any! (Use at room temperature as frosting!)

Photo by Jewel Johnson on Unsplash

Magical Motivators for Mom

Magical Motivators for Mom

By Annette T. Durfee

UGH!  The dishes are undone (again!), the laundry is ludicrous, and you sit defeated on the couch.  You have a mile long list of things to do, but honestly, the motivation to do it just isn’t bubbling to the surface!  Do you ever feel like that?  I surely have. And perhaps it’s because I’ve felt like this SO often that I have developed a list of “go-tos,” or strategies to help me bite the bullet and turn miserable mayhem into a magical motivation.  I thought I’d share a few that have helped me, in hopes that they will help you too!

1. Make it fun! Maybe I’m just a kid at heart, because although I know I could just power through and get the job done, a big part of me says, “why not make it fun?” This is where your creativity comes into play and the sky’s the limit, ladies!  What would make this task A LOT of fun for you?  Turning on the music and dancing while you go at it?  (Yes, even if your children laugh at you!) Listening to a podcast while you work away?  Or how about making it into a game?  A few other ideas:  I purposely buy my favorite scents for cleaning so I can relish the process more. And I’ve been known to let my mind wander as I work while planning a fun family frolic for the future.

2. Better with a buddy – Whether this is your husband, a child, or a really good friend, sometimes it is just easier as well as a lot more fun to tackle the work or a project with a friend in tow.  While they help to shoulder the burden, you both enjoy conversation and even a few good laughs.  Not only do you get something done that needs doing, but somehow, it seems less of a chore.  And of course, the added bonus is that you simultaneously build a stronger relationship. When all is said and done, remember that turn around is fair play – you can offer to help them with what they need as well!

3. Set the timer – Sometimes the main problem is that I am overwhelmed.  Have you been there?  It just seems like there is too much to do, and where in the world do I start?  So, instead of procrastinating, I tell myself, “I will only work for ten minutes at top speed, and then, if I feel like it, I can stop.”  And sometimes I do just that and I honestly feel better because the task at hand is now significantly smaller and easier for the next time I have to face it.  Other times, however, just rolling up my sleeves and really digging in produces momentum and my motivation soars.  (Super Mom powers activate!) I find my mind actually enjoying the process and I don’t want to stop!

4. Reward yourself – I know that some people might look at this as “bribery,” but somehow, I don’t mind doing something if I know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel:  What sounds inspiring to you?  bubble bath? a short nap? a few minutes with a good book?  Or maybe a little snuggle time with your child? Make yourself a deal you can’t refuse, then follow through with it! A word of caution: While I have to admit I “love me” some chocolate, I would suggest steering away from food as a reward (at least on a constant basis) as we all know that would be trading one problem for another.  And if all else fails, remember YOUR WHY! Think of the faces of your beautiful family and what they mean to you.  You are worth it!  They are worth it! Therein lies a reward in and of itself!

5. Reach out – If you find that your motivation is low for extended periods don’t hesitate to reach out for help.  Goodness knows we ALL need it from time to time!  What might this look like for you?  Are you lonely?  Who could you call for a good old-fashioned chat?  Do you feel overwhelmed?  Could you arrange for a sitter so you can hit your list head on?  And what if you feel like sitting in bed day after day for weeks?  If so, there is no shame in scheduling a trip to the doctor to help rule out or treat depression.  Believe me, I’ve been there and I can assure you that there is help for you. You are not alone!

 No matter what strategies you decide upon, I have faith that you WILL find a way.  You can do this!  You are enough and that magical motivation you need is waiting just around the corner. . .

Photo by Edward Cisneros on Unsplash

Five Ways to Handle a Bad Mom Day

Five Ways to Handle a Bad Mom Day

By Samantha Allred Anyone who has spent an entire day with kids knows that it can be overwhelming and difficult. Most days are full of laughter, playing, and joy. But some days are full of tears and tantrums – all day long. On those bad days, it is easy to start down a spiral of stress and frustration and those emotions have a huge impact on our kids. That’s why it is important to know how to change your bad days into good days.  Here are a few tips you can try the next time you’re having a rough day at home with the kids: 1. Get Outside!  If you’re cranky, then the kids are probably cranky too. Dishes and laundry can wait for an hour while you take the kids on a walk or to the park. Let your kids run, soak up some sun, and explore. Being outside is a fantastic mood lifter.  2. Set the Timer for Ten Minutes If you are feeling overwhelmed with a to-do list a mile long, tell the kids you are setting the timer for ten minutes, invite them to help, and do everything you can before the timer goes off. Do the dishes, tidy up, switch the laundry over, take out the trash, sweep the kitchen, or whatever else is an immediate need. You will be surprised at how much you are able to accomplish in a short amount of time. When the timer goes off, stop your chores and focus on your kids. In a few hours, set the timer again. After a few ten minute sessions, hopefully you will have most of your chores done.  3.Talk to Someone  Adult relationships in motherhood are so important. Talking to a friend about life can be a great stress reliever. We all require connection to thrive and it can be hard to feel connected when you only talk to tiny humans all day. Make sure you can talk to somebody about your struggles, your hobbies, your current favorite TV show, or whatever else you want! Consider joining a facebook group or a support group for mothers in your area.  4. Listen to some Mood-Boosting Music Music has been proven time and time again to distract us from fatigue and exhaustion, elevate our mood, lessen anxiety, and even improve our health. Play a favorite album, find some fun action songs to get the kids moving, or have an impromptu dance party in the kitchen.  5. Give Yourself Grace  Remember that you are a good mom. Having a bad day as a mom does not define you. You are allowed to feel stressed and overwhelmed. Everybody has bad days occasionally. Let your kids see you practice the important skill of turning a bad day into a good day. If you find yourself having bad days more frequently, make sure you make yourself a priority by taking a break and practicing self care. You cannot pour from an empty cup, take care of yourself first. Photo by Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash
“Eat Food, Mostly Plants, Not too Much”

“Eat Food, Mostly Plants, Not too Much”

By Alana Hutchins

Have you ever wondered to yourself, What should I eat to be healthy? High-protein or low-protein? Low-fat dairy or whole milk or paleo? Whole grains or gluten free? Fruit or no fruit? High-fat or low fat? There are innumerable voices out there claiming different and even opposite messages, but the good news is, a lot of the basic diets have some common sense similarities. Michael Pollan claims, “the authority of tradition and common sense” to help us navigate this strange new eating world that has made a once simple activity into an entire field of scientific study and a multibillion dollar industry. 

We live in a bleak landscape of SAD- the Standard American Diet. The SAD is generally characterized by high intakes of red meat, processed meat, pre-packaged foods, butter, candy and sweets, fried foods, refined grains, high-fructose corn syrup, high-sugar drinks, and low intakes of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, grass-fed animal products, fish, nuts, and seeds. 

If you want to live your best and most healthful life, start to look at what God has already given you- whole plant foods. The more a food is broken down into different components and reconstructed for taste and shelf life, the less of a food it becomes and the more of a food approximation or an “edible food-like substance.” Forget the lotions and potions, powders and shakes- that’s not food, those are simply food products. If it has more than five ingredients or you don’t recognize the words in the ingredient list, then chances are, it was developed by a food scientist and not a farmer. Most of what we are consuming today is not food, and how we’re consuming it — in the car, in front of the TV, and increasingly alone — is not really eating. Many of these food facsimiles come packaged with health claims which should be our first clue they are anything but healthy.

In the so-called Western diet, food has been replaced by single nutrients, and common sense by confusion. The professionalism of nutrition, or “nutritionism”, for the past fifty years has made America anything but healthier, quite the opposite. Americans are sicker and fatter than ever. This belief system assumes that the key to understanding food is the single nutrient, disregarding the fact that natural foods are a symphony of complex compounds and chemicals that science has yet to all discover, never mind understand how they act in concert with one another. Layer on top of that the complexities of a traditional diet, and trying to sell health as a single macronutrient (think “High-Protein) is laughable. 

The real food, the food your great grandmother would recognize as food, sits quietly on the perimeter of the grocery stores, with its naturally bright coloring and unassuming packaging. I can hear you saying now, but what about protein shakes and power bars- those are healthy right? “Good” for you food is a spectrum and a power bar might be better than a bag of chips, but your safest bet is nuts and a piece of whole fruit as a healthy go-to snack. 

In other words, try to eat a Whole Foods, Plant based diet. Think beans, legumes, fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. Potatoes with the skins on, lentil curry, fresh salads with olive oil and vinegar, hummus with crudités. No more counting calories, or grams, or desperately trying to remember the difference between Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids. Vitamin supplements just turn into expensive urine and they are in NO WAY a substitute for fruits and vegetables. Consuming a diet rich in whole plant foods is the best way to avoid chronic diseases in the future including diabetes, obesity, heart disease, cancer and even autoimmune diseases. Eating does not have to be complicated, simple is usually best, but it will take more time to plan ahead and prepare than just grabbing a Cliff bar or downing an energy shake. A landmark study known as the China Project, combined with laboratory findings—conclusively demonstrated the dangers of a diet high in animal protein and the amazing health benefits of a whole food, plant-based diet. You say, yeah I’d like to be healthy but I’m not going vegan, that’s just too hard! Life can get crazy, so if you are hitting your whole-foods plant-based diet 80-90% of the time, you are doing awesome and keep up the good work! You will receive 80-90% of the benefits.

You might also say, yeah but I still have baby weight I want to lose and all the sources I read say to eat a diet low in “carbs” and high in protein. Isn’t losing weight healthy? This approach to weight loss, based on the ketogenic effect, or keto diets for short, involves cutting way back on carbohydrates, to 50 grams a day or less, to help the body achieve a state of ketosis, in which it has to burn fat (rather than sugar) for energy. This diet, like most diets, does work to help control weight gain and even induce weight loss in the short term, but it is hard to stick with long term. Most people will regain a lot of the weight they lost as soon as they go back on carbs. It is an issue with any fad diet, but it seems to be extra common with ketosis. Stop looking at short term effects rather than your long term goals of remaining healthy over a life span and look twenty years down the road to a life free of heart-disease and cancer. There are other dangerous side effects that can come from approaching the keto diet the wrong way including fatigue, decreased performance, head-aches, diarrhea, and even halitosis (bad breath.) Think of meat as a side dish or garnish, rather than the principal component of the meal. 

When you are in the supermarket try to avoid food products containing ingredients that are unfamiliar, unpronounceable, more than five in number, or include high-fructose corn syrup. For that matter, all diets out there pretty much agree that sugars, including corn syrup and high-fructose corn syrup, are unnecessary foods and should be reduced as much as possible or eliminated completely. 

Unfortunately there is one fairly obvious problem with all this advice: Americans don’t primarily eat food that comes in a box with a long list of “health claims” because we actually think it is healthier than a home-cooked meal. We do so because it is convenient, often cheaper, and we are addicted to high-fructose corn syrup, salt, and saturated fat laced in almost every food product. There is no silver bullet for changing our lifestyles and improving our health. It takes commitment, a dedication of monetary resources, hard work, and a certain amount of self-denial. On the upside though, measure that against reclaiming the pleasures of eating real foods, becoming your healthiest and most energetic self, and taking control of your own table.

Photo by Rachel Park on Unsplash

SOURCES CITED:

  • In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan, 2008
  • The China Study by T. Colin Campbell and his son, Thomas M. Campbell II, 2004
Staying Motivated through the Mundane

Staying Motivated through the Mundane

By Stephanie Simmons

Taking care of the home can be pretty mundane. I really do like a clean home. I also go in a continuous cycle of being on top of my game to ignoring the mess and hoping everyone else does too. There are many valid reasons and excuses to not keep our houses clean. And there are definitely different seasons in life that might affect the attention our home gets(some examples: rough pregnancy, emotional state not being taken care of, illness, etc). 

For those seasons that are not the exception, how do we stay motivated through the mundane? I think firstly, we need to recognize that we are doing better than we think! Give yourself credit for the things you are doing! We are often too hard on ourselves. 

Secondly, your home is not a museum, it is a home. This was told to me by my husband many years ago when my 3rd child was starting to get around. It seemed that as I was cleaning, she would go around and undo the work I was doing, and I seemed to care more about a clean house than spending time with my kids. I was getting frustrated and perhaps a little overwhelmed. Probably after a rant of frustration or something, he told me, “It’s ok to have some mess in the house. We don’t live in a museum; this is a home.” That has really stuck with me and helped me many times as I lose focus and start caring more about a clean home than the people in the home.

I can remember a time when I was reflecting on how annoying and mundane it was to have to keep doing the same housework day after day, and week after week. It was hard to find the motivation to want to do my chores. At some point in my ruminations, I thought, maybe if I change the way I view what I am doing, it won’t be so bad. I thought to view the housework as service to my family. I like to serve others. In fact, cleaning another’s home was always more enjoyable than cleaning my own. I also like to remind myself that I love how the end results make me feel when I have a clean home. And one last thing I try to focus on is that it is actually a little therapeutic getting lost in my thoughts, or listening to an audio book or talk, while I clean. Even talking on the phone to a family member or friend really helps the mundane chore get done in an enjoyable way. 

As my kids have gotten older and have been able to contribute more, and I have had to train them and motivate them, they get a little lecture about “family contributions.” This wording comes from a parenting book I read by the Eyre family. It helped us see that everyone in the family contributes. We have our dad who contributes by going into work and brings in money for our home. We take care of the home to earn our part and our income, or payment, is in the form of clothes, food, home, etc. My lecture would include pointing out the things they do and need that require work to make happen(you eat, so you need clean dishes and food, and there is a mess from using them, cost to buying the food, etc). 

When it comes to caring for our homes(formerly called doing chores;) ), remember, you are doing a great job! Your home is for living in, focus on the positive, and enlist your children in the family contributions. Our homes can be a clean home to help us live happily in!

 

Tips for helping kick-start your cleaning: 

  • Just tell yourself, I will just fold 5 pieces of laundry, or I will wash/load just 5 dishes. It’s a small start that isn’t as intimidating as all the piles, and once you start, you usually will keep going. If you don’t keep going, just tell yourself the same thing again 🙂
  • Create a weekly schedule for your housework. Some people want to do it all in one day, but I prefer to break it out into days. If I happen to miss a day, it is ok if that bathroom is skipped one week; it will be cleaned the next week, just stick with the next day’s work(except laundry, see next tip)
  • Scheduling laundry: I have a set day for each person’s laundry and other types of laundry(towels, sheets, rags, etc). I try to keep my kids’ wardrobes on the small side, about 8-10 outfits per kid. Their laundry is done separately from everyone else, so there is no need for sorting. The set day also helps so that there are not mountains of laundry to face in one day, but smaller “bite-sized” loads to do each day. 
  • Train your children well to do age-appropriate household chores. It is hard work up front, but worth it!

(I could go on and on about my house schedule for chores, but that is for another time. And there are so many different ways to make this all happen. Find what works for you.)

Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash