By Samantha Allred
Getting your kids to eat a healthy meal is no easy task. You will only survive if you can learn to laugh about it. Check out these 5 relatable memes to help you cope with the mealtime madness.
When a child is learning to recognize shapes, they may attempt to put a round block in the square hole, or the square block in the triangle hole. They may become frustrated and believe it won’t work, therefore giving up. We love our children and we want to help them understand that placing the circle block in the circle hole will fit. We take a moment to exhibit how this is done and we explain the process as we perform the action. Our child observes us putting the right block in the right hole and that it does work and so they desire to model after us. They try and try until they begin to recognize and understand the shape matches the hole it fits into. Rarely will it be the first time. It takes practice and learning the skill of matching the block to the correct hole.
Even as adults, we sometimes believe things won’t work — until our perspective becomes clearer as we learn from watching others succeed. Budgeting is like fitting the right piece in the right place. It CAN work for us, too!
“ I cannot afford it” “There is not enough money”
A common phrase we all may have thought when thinking about giving money to tithing or a donation to a nonprofit.
As you do your best to make ends meet, sometimes there really doesn’t seem to be enough. It feels like a square peg going into a round hole. Many people go year to year living paycheck to paycheck. When writing your budget, many times the total ends with a negative balance. You are not alone and this is a very common lifestyle for many.
It has taken me many years to change my understanding of how to manage the “outgo” of our family finances.
We are actually correct in thinking that when we spend our money on the bills and frills first that nothing is left for God. We need shelter, food and clothes so those are at the top of our list. No one wants to go hungry, naked or be out in the cold. So it is natural to rationalize why those would be our first expenses. However, God has asked us to be generous and make contributions to a church or other organization that cares for the needy.
Our Creator made all things possible through all He created on this earth: we rely on the earth for the food at our table; clothes and our homes are made from the very substance of the earth.
I would like to use the example in the Personal Finances Self Reliance Manual, page 41 (published by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints)
Picture that we have a glass jar which represents our income (a resource of limited size). a big rock representing our debt to the Lord, pebbles representing our savings for our future selves, and sand, representing our current needs and wants..
Take the empty jar and fill it with the sand first, then place the pebbles in, and finally put in the big rock. By following these instructions, there is no room for the big rock. It will not all fit in the jar. This is the most common way we arrange our budget, like the square peg in the round hole.
But what if we put the big rock in first, add the pebbles, then pour in the sand? You will find that it is possible for everything to fit in the jar.
“I have enough and more” – this can be your new phrase! Abundance mentality.
Our family has chosen to put God first by paying our tithing and a fast offering. We have discovered that our money has always been sufficient for our needs and beyond. And it is fun to find the miracles that make it happen.
Ask other people you know and trust about how they arrange their budget and what works for them. Search different ideas on budgeting. You don’t have to pay anyone to tell you how – there are plenty of free resources. But take the time to find what works for you.
Put the circle block in the circle hole as you recognize that giving back to your Creator is your biggest rock and all the pebbles and sand will have room by taking this step first in your budget.
By Annette T. Durfee
Snuggled up in my arms, my little grandson stares up at me with his big beautiful innocent eyes. Together we rock back and forth in the overstuffed chair singing song after song and I’m convinced that I love him more every second! As I sing, my mind wanders back to yesteryear when my babies were tiny and I sang song after song to them – hoping to relax them and hush their sleepytime fears. Hoping to instill in them the things I knew were true. Hoping to fill their hearts with the love that I had for them.
It’s amazing how magical music can be! Music has a way of touching our hearts and filling our memories with the best things of life.
Music was at the heart of the home I grew up in, so naturally, as an adult, I shared it with my children. We sang lilting lullabies and fun children’s sing-along recordings. We also offered xylophones, harmonicas, recorders, and rhythm instruments for the little ones to explore creating their own sounds.
As a classical musician, I knew the benefits of classical music: an increased learning capacity, creativity, and self-esteem, to name only a few. Knowing that our children weren’t going to grow up on a farm (like my parents did), we still wanted to teach them hard work, patience, and discipline. We decided to instill these values through formal music lessons! Thus, we became the beneficiaries of practice sessions, morning-noon-and-night! We eagerly attended recitals and concerts galore! Music sweetly and simply lent a soothing atmosphere to our home and even our car, as we traveled to and fro.
Music became a parenting friend that would quiet the mayhem of the moment. When life became a little hairy and scary and the decibel level was a little too high, I would nonchalantly pop in a CD of classical music or church hymns (my secret weapons!) and – voila! – an essence of calm and peace would descend! Soon, things would settle down.
With a house full of rambunctious kiddos, we found that with a little creativity, there seemed to be a song for every situation that could gently persuade, teach, or motivate. Songs to make diaper changes more pleasant, songs to make hair washing less scary, songs to help children cooperate when it was time to brush their teeth. Sometimes songs distracted us from the mundane and helped to pass the time while we did the dishes or other chores. At bedtime, songs even helped us march up to bed in a happy way! We became a train connecting arms at the shoulders and chugging up the stairs singing, “Choo choo choo, what’s coming down the track?” The person in the lead would “pull the whistle” and up we went.
Music was an unseen friend that added joy and spontaneity to our lives at just the right time! Sometimes the music was a toe – tapping “Turkey in the Straw” for a Thanksgiving program! Or the girls would make up choreography to a whimsical children’s song, their fancy dresses swirling in a wide circle. Sometimes a child surprised us with an unsolicited solo of a kindergarten-melody as they stood atop a make-shift stage (aka a chair in the dining room). And impromptu Family Talent Shows gave us rousing marches, emphasized by mini flags in the front room!
With littles on the loose, life is more pleasant with a song in your heart. In your home or on the go, music has the power to create a sort of a haven that smooths the creases of chaos and lifts the spirit. So, whether your family chooses to learn an instrument or two, sing at top volume in the shower, or pop in a favorite CD, music is the power to make any moment a happy one!
Photo by Colin Maynard on Unsplash
By Allison Marquina
As mothers, we want to do what is best for our children. We want to do our best to help them become the best versions of themselves so that they can experience happy and successful lives. We also know every child is different. When it comes to parenting techniques, what works for one child might not work for another. We might think we’ve figured out nap time but then our next child comes around and all the sudden the book, song, bed combination doesn’t work. This can be frustrating. However, there are principles that we as mothers can rely on to help guide us no matter the child. One way to look at these principles is through the well known fairytale, Goldilocks and the Three Bears.
Goldilocks finds herself in an empty home. As she explores, she tries the bears’ porridges, their chairs, and even their beds. Each time she experiences two different extremes until she finds “just right.” One porridge is too hot, the other is too cold, the last is just right. One bed is too hard, another too soft, the last is just right. The same can be said about different parenting styles.
Generally, there are considered to be three parenting styles. Authoritarian, permissive, and authoritative: too hard, too soft, and just right, in that order.
The “too hard” or “too hot” parenting style is referred to as authoritarian. This parenting style stems from a desire to control our child and their behaviors. This is the “because I said so” technique where rules are valued and prioritized and where there is not a lot of open communication with the child. Unfortunately, this parenting style can lead to children becoming more aggressive, having low self-esteem, not very self-reliant, and even rebellion as they grow older (https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/authoritarian_parenting_style).
On the opposite end of the spectrum, the “too soft” version, which is called permissive parenting. This is when parents show lots of love and affection for their children, but there are not a lot of boundaries or enforcement of rules. Though these children do tend to have higher self-esteem, they often lack responsibility, tend to be more selfish, and are more likely to experience anxiety and depression (https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/permissive_parenting_style).
We want a good balance, the “just right” parenting style. This is referred to as authoritative parenting. An authoritative parent has reasonable expectations for their children while also encouraging them to be independent and make their own decisions that are developmentally appropriate. There is a lot of love and open communication while also setting limits and boundaries. When we do our best to implement this type of parenting, our children are more likely to be responsible, able to manage their emotions, have high self-esteem, and are happier (https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/authoritative_parenting_style).
As you are trying your best to be the mom your child deserves, remember to give grace and forgiveness to you and your child. There will be times when you aren’t the best version of yourself and there will be times that no matter how good of a parent you are, your child will do what they want to do. Just do your best and remember that “tomorrow is another day” (Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchel).
Click the link to download the handout: Parenting Techniques Handout
Photo by David Brooke Martin on Unsplash
Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to YUMMIFY your mothering experience.
That’s right — today’s tip is yummy! It’s one of my favorite smoothie recipes called Cuppa Reese’s…
It doesn’t actually have any Reese’s in it, so maybe I’m breaking some kind of trademark laws… But it does have chocolate and peanut butter in it, so really I am honoring the genius of the Reese’s people by naming this concoction after their incredible delectable combination of ingredients.
Two things separate my recipe from the Reese’s product:
First of all: It’s drinkable!
Secondly: It’s good for me! And for You!
The first ingredient in all my smoothies is spinach… I hide it in my food to help myself get more of this superfood goodness and (cross my heart) I do not notice the flavor when mixed with all the other yummies…
So, stuff a handful or two of fresh spinach (so we’re strong to the finish!) down into the bottom of the blender. Here’s a hint: you can buy fresh spinach and, after washing it, throw it in the freezer since you’re just going to blend it up into a nice cold smoothie anyway!
Next throw in some frozen Banana Chunks — about 1 and 1/2 banana’s-worth
Add 1/4 cup each of cocoa powder and peanut butter
1 tsp vanilla extract
Now add your favorite milk (I like almond or coconut) — maybe half a cup? Just enough to blend all these ingredients into creamy yummyness.
Gather the kids around for Cuppa Reese’s and they’ll much prefer this method of getting their spinach in their system!
Do you have a favorite smoothie recipe? Share it on our Momivate facebook page! If you’re new to the world of smoothies, add spinach to your grocery list and try it out sometime this week, then share if this practice elevates your mothering!
Photo by American Heritage Chocolate on Unsplash
By Cindy Thomsen
I am a mom of 3 kids. When my kids were younger, we set up several systems to facilitate our life. I have found that having good routines in place has helped our family tremendously.
Finding meaningful schedules and systems keeps our family household running smoothly, creates structure in our home, prevents many arguments, and gets us through daily tasks quickly and efficiently, thus leaving more time for other things.
Creating regular and consistent schedules and systems in your home will help you feel more successful as a parent. When life gets busy, setting specific routines can help you simplify your workload and elevate your family life, allowing you to feel more control in your everyday family life.
One of my favorite systems that we have in place in our home is our afternoon schedule. When my oldest was in first grade, I really felt like we needed time to do homework, reading, and any other projects and assignments that came up. So we set up a homework area by the kitchen table. When my kids came home from school, the first thing we did was sit down and work on their homework. I made sure that my schedule was open as well so I could be there to help if needed.
Amazingly, within a year or so, it had become such a habit for my kids that when friends would want to play with them right after school, they would tell them they could play after their homework was done. Usually, they still had time to play with friends before dinner. Here is a picture of my kids all doing their homework on the porch. Great way to enjoy the nice day!
What I have learned over the years of following this system is that as teenagers, my kids continued to follow this routine. It is such a part of them now that they still do their homework first as soon as they get home (or first thing in the morning on social distance days). Now, I don’t have to nag them or follow through on their homework, they just do it. This one simple routine has saved us so much stress and potential headaches. It had a major effect on their ability to get good grades and prioritize important things in our lives. I’ve also found that when they have a question, they could ask each other!
I also found that I have really enjoyed this special time after school with my kids. I like to call it my “golden hour” because my kids are super chatty right after they get home from school. Once we get done talking, homework is done quickly and that leaves us more time after dinner to have fun together!
It feels like there are things that always need to be done in our home. These systems will help simplify your life! Setting up specific schedules and systems in your home will allow you to create a home environment that can flow seamlessly, elevating your time together as a family.